As hard as it may be to believe, the nineties MTV cartoon Beavis and Butthead actually had a point. That point being, that watching too much TV could make you stupid.

As we examine today’s story, I think it will become apparent why this came to mind.

Two Texas men, by the name of Gavin Weisenburg and Tanner Thomas, were both arrested after they had planned an invasion of an African island, with the intention of killing all the men on the island, and turning all the women and children into their sex slaves.

That was already a mouthful. And yet, there’s still more to unpack.

As part of their plan, the two studied Haitian Creole, researched firearms and the means to transport them, and joined the Air Force with the intention of attaining tactical knowledge. One of them is accused of spending time in Thailand to learn to commandeer a boat in preparation for their mission.

The two would transfer to an air base near DC, where the two would attempt to recruit homeless people for their invasion.

Crossing the Atlantic with an army of stoner dipshits? What can go wrong?

For one thing, they got caught. Because that’s how it went down, they now face potential life imprisonment, and possibly up to 30 more years for a charge of generating Cheese Pizza.

But what could have happened is that they could have attempted the trip, and the sea itself could’ve kicked their asses. A trip across the Atlantic by boat is no joke. Especially with hurricanes.

Finally, and worst for them, they could’ve actually arrived on the island, and promptly got their asses beat by the island’s 87000 inhabitants.

Wowee, there’s so much to this story that’s hard to believe. For one thing, that there was one person who had the idea to invade an island to turn it’s entire female population into their personal harem. But what’s more, that there were two such people, and they somehow found each other.

What’s more, I thought that the US armed forces turned people away if their IQs were less than 82. But not only did Beavis and Butthead join, they got into the Air Force, which is supposed to be where the smart boys end up.

Third, I act under the assumption that even ordinary US citizens are under surveillance, though I wish that that wasn’t the case. How is it that these two were actually in the government (by virtue of being in the armed forces) and their plan got as far as it did?

Then there’s the apparent assumption that the international community would just turn a blind eye to a gaggle of American stoners invading Africa. Did these two really think their plan would prosper in the long run, or even come anywhere close to working?

I don’t know, but I get the idea that Mike Judge tried to warn us.