Stand Your Ground: An Answer to Coach Red Pill

A YouTuber by the handle Coach Red Pill is having a black pill moment. In one of his newer videos, dated October 8, he suggested leaving western counties while you still can, citing the rise of the authoritarian left. While he is astute in his assessing their control of the major institutions and how the checks and balances have all but disappeared from this republic, I can take issue with his idea that the way to properly handle this development is to flee to some third-world country in an effort to escape the surveillance state, and it’s increasingly systematic suppression of dissent.

While I disagree with him, he still has an interesting opinion, and if you have about 14 minutes of time, it’s worth giving it a listen. For your convenience, here it is, embedded:

While the failure on the part of the American government to recognize basic Americans’ freedoms, and the wild flit towards authoritarianism to contain a mere case of the sniffles is indeed a tragic thing to endure, one can hear Coach’s suggestion to flee to a pallet-jack home in a country such as Argentina (or Ukraine, where he apparently shot his video), and ask, “Is this really what you managed to come up with?”

Seriously, is that it? To just run? After all that careful thought, to run off and surrender what ground you were standing was the best you could come up with?

Look, I know that it hurts to be punched, or to be beaten with bike locks. I also know that the left has a near-endless supply of unemployed losers to carry out violent activism as foot soldiers, all while being virtually indemnified by corrupt left-wing prosecutors. But when our own culture is being suppressed in an accelerating rate, to flee the battle comes off as little more than timid self-preservation.

While I recognize the desire to see the left “snap out of it” and recognize that they’ve been going too far, that becomes far less likely to happen when the very people who should be serving as a check to their power surrenders the ground they should be standing.

Stand your ground. This is where the battle is being fought, and where it will be won. Or lost.

But if you were to run off to some place that hardly has running water, what makes you think that whatever peace you find will be anything but temporary? The left’s flit towards extremism isn’t merely a local event, it’s global. If the people who stand the best chance of fighting back were instead to just run off somewhere, there soon won’t be a place where one can flee.

Right now, the enemies of truth, freedom, human intellect, and individual liberties have just about any advantage that one could possibly think of: control of information through corporate media, social engineering through advertisers and social media, extensive psychological profiles on each one of us, surveillance with drones that can monitor a pedestrian from miles away, tremendous amounts of wealth through garnishing the paychecks of most people who work, the list goes on and on.

But the greatest advantage that they could ask for is an opposition that’s willing to flee when sufficiently demoralized. After all, if the police who disagreed with authoritarianism were the only ones who were to resign from the force, we’d only be left with authoritarian police, and the trend would only be expected to accelerate.

Sometimes, the battle looks tough. I get that. As enthusiastic as we may have been when we took up the fight, we’re bound to run into days in which we don’t feel like fighting it. There will be times when it looks like the enemy has an overwhelming advantage, which has a lot to do with the fact that they’ve presented themselves that way. However, the outcome of a conflict isn’t always apparent in the moment. Need I remind you that in the days of American independence, the British had a world-spanning empire?

Right now, the battle is here, and this is where you’re needed. But if you’re just going to turn coward and run, don’t be surprised when we don’t take you back. After all, what father, perceiving the difficulties of providing for his family, would simply run off and abandon them when things get hard? Would anyone have pity for him? In the same way, if someone were to run off when things got hard, would it be accepted of him if he were to thank us for the easy times?

But if he’s really serious about it, Coach Red Pill is free to run off to some Pacific island or somewhere to set up “Freedomistan”, if he’s really just up for his own self-preservation. Who knows, if a bunch of Trump supporters were to somehow claim some mound in an otherwise Sharia state, they might butterfly effect their way to some bastion of freedom that resembles the one that they abandoned.

Cambridge University Now Encouraging Women to Have Children

No matter how prevalent the forces of bullshit become, natural law remains in effect. It’s because of this that we have the expression, “play stupid games, win stupid prizes”.

The Malthusian movement has been losing steam, as countries are experiencing birth rates that are falling below the replacement rate. This is a disaster for aging boomers, considering that for Social Security to work as a scheme for wealth extraction, there actually has to be a certain number of people from whom to extract wealth.

I’ve been aware of the uniparty’s reversal of course for a few months. And, as I expected, there has been inertia, as it could take as long as a few years for programs to be rewritten or replaced or for contracts to expire, and for the culture to shift back to more traditional values.

In light of this, I think we can appreciate the irony of Cambridge’s new position, considering all that they’ve already done to contribute to the problem: They’ve long encouraged women to continually pay into the system (mainly by borrowing tons of money) to further their education and careers, until they are in their thirties, when their fertility starts to decline. Then, when you go to dating sites, you find countless women in their forties with useless degrees, desperate to have children.

But rather than fall on their sword, Cambridge instead subtly changes course, encouraging women to start having children as young as their early twenties, so they’d be more likely to have as many as three children (which is above the replacement rate of about 2.1). Of course, the undertones are highly creepy, but it’s still a sign that Cambridge (and colleges in general) will be transitioning back to more axiomatic values that have been tested and found to have resulted in healthy, successful families and societies throughout the entirety of human history.

While that might sound optimistic, it’s pretty much necessary, considering that the human specie isn’t adapted to anything else.

What would be optimistic is to assume that the uniparty and Malthusianism have learned their lessons. Rather than allowing people to live their own lives and make their own choices, they’re instead trying to manipulate society in an effort to reverse trends, in such a way that allows them to maintain control, and, of course, so they can die rich. It’s about power and money to these guys, as evidenced by the fact that they’re changing course to pursue them.

Well, “tough nuggets” is what I’d have to say, if I could decide what becomes of them. Let them know what it’s like to only have enough money to barely get by from month-to-month, hardly able to pay the bills. Just as they’ve been doing to me. They’re the ones that actually deserve it.

Review: Metroid Dread

Developer: Mercury Steam
Publisher: Nintendo
Genre: Platformer, Exploration
Rating: Teen
Platform:
 Nintendo Switch

After having spent years as an urban legend, Metroid Dread has finally dropped, which goes to show that it’s going to take a lot more than being cancelled to stop a true warrior.

In the long-awaited sequel to Metroid Fusion, and what is currently the last in the series in order of the current timeline, the Galactic Federation has dispatched a group of E.M.M.I. robots to the planet ZDR to investigate a strange transmission. However, when contact with the E.M.M.I. has been lost, Samus goes to ZDR to investigate, fearing the possible return of the dreaded X parasites.

During the investigation, Samus encounters a Chozo warrior, and is quickly overcome in battle. Mysteriously, the battle has resulted in Samus being without most of her abilities. In a reversal compared to the rest of the series, rather than starting the game from Samus’ ship and descending into the caverns of an alien world, Samus instead starts at the bottom of the remnants of a civilization, and must ascend to the top in order to escape alive.

Matters become far more complicated with the fact that the borderline-indestructible E.M.M.I. have gone rogue, and will hunt Samus down if she goes anywhere within their coverage areas.

If you’re in this spot, you don’t wanna miss.

So, that’s the story, but how does the game actually play? That’s where it gets even better.

Like most Metroid games outside of the Prime series, Metroid Dread is a 2D platformer set in huge, interconnected areas that main character Samus Aran explores autonomously. Most areas have multiple branching paths, with very subtle (if any) clues as to which path would take Samus to either a major confrontation or an upgrade to her mobility. Even dead ends may provide opportunity to discover power-ups such as permanent expansions to her missile-carrying capacity, so players have incentive to explore ZDR’s huge caverns, for the treasures that await them. Even getting lost may have its rewards.

Initially, Samus’ techniques are limited. But as she picks up major upgrades to her mobility (such as improved jumps and the series-staple Morph Ball), more functions are mapped to the control scheme. While the controls get complex by late game, the gradual implementation of Samus’ abilities helps to keep players from being overwhelmed by the amount of techniques.

Samus does start the game with some useful abilities that remain helpful throughout. One of these is a slide that allows her to go under narrow openings, which acts as a convenient alternative to the Morph Ball when in a hurry. Another helpful ability is when Samus aims with a laser pointer, allowing her to fire in any direction. Samus has to be standing still to do this, which makes sense, considering that in real life it’s usually easier to aim with precision when standing still. During boss fights, this usually means taking the risk of standing still if it means possibly getting in more accurate attacks.

Ride that slide!

I’ve noticed early on that Missiles are usually better to use during boss fights than charged beam attacks. I remember that in some previous Metroid games, the opposite was true, and I liked spamming charged attacks. It’s a change I welcome, considering that it’s sensible from a game mechanics perspective for the resource that has the potential to be limited by quantity has higher damage potential. But unless you’ve been missing a significant amount of ammo upgrades and play carelessly, you should have plenty of missiles for most boss fights.

Metroid Dread may provide a lot of abilities, but that doesn’t mean it holds the player’s hand. It’s expected of players to pick up on acquired abilities quickly, and if players can recall them late in the game, that might make some difficult boss battles go a lot smoother.

That brings us to the next point: Metroid Dread is not an easy game. Even on the normal difficulty, players of average skill level can expect to take multiple attempts on bosses before finally emerging victorious. I remember that there was at least a couple times in which I had taken a few attempts on a boss, so I decided to make attempts where I mostly just performed evasive maneuvers, with minimal attacking, in order to practice at avoiding the boss’s attacks. That helped, as subsequent attempts mostly went a lot smoother.

Comparisons have been made with Dark Souls in terms of the difficulty of the boss battles, so victory against most bosses aren’t something that’s just handed to you. Beating the bosses in Metroid Dread is a matter of skill, and when a boss is overcome, it feels like an accomplishment.

Run, girl!

But the bosses aren’t the only things in this game that bring the tension. In Metroid Dread, there’s a total of seven E.M.M.I. running about. Each of the E.M.M.I. has an assigned area which it doesn’t leave, but because you’ll have to run through these immense areas to proceed, Samus will have to confront them.

When you come across an E.M.M.I., there’s usually nothing you can do except try to avoid being noticed, and when you are noticed, you pretty much have to run and hide. What’s more, these things are scary intelligent, and usually come along to investigate where they hear sounds.

If an E.M.M.I. catches Samus, it’s usually Game Over. Yeah, there’s a brief quick-time opportunity to escape it’s clutches, but because it’s so hard to time, just touching an E.M.M.I. usually means having to retry. But thankfully, Metroid Dread is generous with restarting the player just outside E.M.M.I. areas and boss doors, so the player can make another attempt right away if they so choose.

In exploration platform games, colloquially known as Metroidvania games, a significant part of the experience is the sensation of movement. And thankfully for the chief genre-namer, movement in Metroid Dread is a joy. Samus responds with just the right combination of realism, momentum, and lack of hesitation to controller input. And what’s more, there’s a sense of power to her many mobility upgrades, to the point that by the end of the game, it really feels as though nothing is missing from Samus’ arsenal.

It’s not polite to point.

What’s more, none of the upgrades unbalance the game. There’s no one upgrade that’s perfect for every occasion, but they usually come with a sense of freedom that comes with knowing just how it can be used to overcome an obstacle that rendered previously encountered passageways and power-ups off-limits. And when you find out that an upgrade that you might not have been thinking much about at the time might make a boss battle much easier, that’s really satisfying in its own sense.

It usually goes that when someone buys a new game, there comes a risk that a game with current-gen visuals compromises with mechanical soundness. However, in Metroid Dread’s case, there is no such compromise, as the game offers tight, rewarding gameplay with excellent production values, all wrapped in the same package. While the platforming is in two dimensions, the environments are rendered in polygonal models. Metroid Dread is far from the first game to do this, but what Dread accomplishes is so rich and atmospheric that it’s a strong argument in favor of upgrading to a Switch OLED if you intend to spend a lot of time playing in handheld mode. There are many little touches here and there which goes to show just how much thought that Mercury Steam put into it. For example, there’s a thin, barely-noticeable haze of display static when Samus is in areas where there is an E.M.M.I. active, which conveys an eerie, unsettling technological sense that something is off.

What the E.M.M.I. can’t see, can’t hurt it.

As much as I’d like to discuss the events in the game, and what they mean for the overarching Metroid narrative, I think the best way to discover them is to play the game for yourself. This is one game that’s a blast to play, so that discovery isn’t likely to feel like a chore to a gamer without a crippling case of ennui.

Now, onto the score. It’s my great pleasure to give Metroid Dread top honors:
10 out of 10.

In times past, Metroid games have been something that one might consider to hold themselves over while waiting for some other big release. With Metroid Dread, the Metroid series demonstrates that it’s deserving of more respect.

Maddox’s Article on Swine Flu Aged Well.

Maddox’s online persona, not to be confused with a popular graphic depicting a racist communist sympathizer.

In the year 2009, web comedian Maddox published an article on swine flu. If that article were like piss in a bottle, that piss has aged, fermenting into a fine piss schnapps.

In case you’re having trouble remembering what swine flu was, it was a coronavirus that caused a mild cough, and that was about it. It was pretty much like Covid-19, except the political left didn’t go absolutely insane.

Maddox started his article by claiming that he deleted his mom’s number, because she called him worried about some sensationalist news story. While Maddox’s politics seem to be left-leaning today, what he went on to say was surprisingly red-pilled:

“If you’ve spent more than a few minutes worrying about swine flu, you are an idiot. That’s because it only takes a few minutes to look up the symptoms, mortality rate, and treatment to realize that it’s no different from the common flu (which kills way more people and by extension is way more awesome), and going back to whatever it is you were doing, which was probably turning off CNN and canceling your cable subscription.”

Maddox was early on the whole fake news dealie, and on comparing symptoms and fatality rates, and realizing that the virus in question isn’t worth letting world leaders carry out an economic suicide pact.

Maddox has his own idea on how to handle a pandemic of sniffles:

“Cowards worry and there is a 100% overlap between people who worry and people who regularly make cowardly decisions. That’s why natural disasters kick so much ass. You never really know when they’re going to hit, so you might as well let go and stop being such a scared pussy all the time. You’ll cross the bridge of death when you get to it. Time to start taking risks, asshole!”

What’s more, Maddox expressed a viewpoint that would have gotten him labeled as “anti-vax” today:

“I will never take the swine flu vaccine because I already have it; it’s called my immune system, and it’s badass.”

This has become even more awesome in light of the revelation that natural immunity is immensely superior to the Covid vax. The optics are stunning, and provide a window into the kind of thinking that was popular before the lockdowns driving up job losses and suicide rates drove everyone collectively insane.

Maddox also got into a short rant on how he believes that marriage is a sham institution, which makes him sound suspiciously MGTOW. If that’s something that you’ve never heard of, MGTOW is what happens when incels decide to give up, but then pretend that they’ve won. They then prattle on as though they’ve discovered some secret that makes them sound enlightened, even though their whole movement basically comes down to playing video games while waiting for death. What’s that secret? Apparently, it’s that if they can’t find a woman who’s willing to touch their genitals, they can just do it themselves. They’d be somewhat tolerable if they weren’t such obnoxious recruiters.

If you think Maddox’s points on swine flu would carry over to the coronavirus, it would seem like Maddox would, too. He republished the same article, striking out the term “swine flu” and replacing with with “coronavirus”.

When you look at how based Maddox once was, it’s almost a shame that he just about abandoned the website that made him popular, and went on to try to become yet another YouTuber. But as he is now, he’s another relic from the age of the internet angry man, trying to find his way in the age when everyone is looking over their shoulders.

Anthony Fauci is an Inferior Man.

Anthony Fauci literally just said that “There comes a time when you have to give up what you consider your individual right of making your own decision”.

I can guess what you’re thinking: “There’s no way. How can anyone be so out of touch with reality as to say something so devastatingly wrong?”

I don’t expect you to take my word for it, so I’m sharing video evidence. In it, Fauci tells us plebs that because we’ve been benefiting so well from society, we should give back by giving up our right to make choices for ourselves. Putting aside, of course, that society under Fauci and his other leftist corporate interests have attempted to shut us in our homes and are now pulling out the stops to threaten us into taking a vaccine that we don’t trust.

Here’s what stupid sounds like:

One of the many things that Fauci is ignorant of is the fact that the American republic was founded by better men than Anthony Fauci. What these men understood was that human rights were axiomatic tenets of reality that every human being has, as they penned in the following blurb from some old document that they might still teach about in schools:

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”

The United States Declaration of Independence

Even if you don’t believe in a Creator, you should still understand individual rights to be a matter of superordinate principle, in a manner similar to natural law. Every human being has a right to security in their property, without it being stolen from them. Every human being has a right to their own sincerely-held religious beliefs, or any conviction they may have. They have a right to express their opinions, even if there are consequences for doing so. A person has a right to defend themselves. A person has a right to their silence, without it being taken as self-incrimination. Every person has a right to their own means of production.

In that these rights are unalienable, means that they exist by default, it is impossible for a person to voluntarily give them up, are not granted by human government, and if any government doesn’t recognize the existence of these rights, that government is wrong.

Continuing on, the Declaration of Independence has this to say:

“That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed,”

No one can be governed unless they allow it. It doesn’t require a lengthy explanation, because it’s entirely self-explanatory. Anthony Fauci doesn’t govern me, because I refuse to be governed by inferior men.

The republic’s founders continue with language that puts those who would follow Fauci’s example on notice:

“That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness.”

I know that some limp-wristed incel might latch onto the use of the word “Safety”, and twist it to mean something that it doesn’t. The fact is, safety implies bodily autonomy, including the freedom to turn down a vaccine that one does not trust.

When a government twists the concept of safety into a pretext to challenge the axiomatic freedoms, that government should be altered or removed. That’s some food for thought for the Democrat establishment, if they are at all interested in retaining their place in American government.

After all, in nature, as is the case in human society, and has been demonstrated throughout history, the followers don’t endure being abused by their leaders for very long.

There is an old proverb, and because it originated in China, I suspect that Fauci has heard of it. It goes like this:

“The emperor that burned all the books was overthrown by illiterate men.”

Cenk Uygur, Get Over Yourself

Cenk Uygur of The Young Turks is no stranger to drama. He is the most prominent mouthpiece of a leftist YouTube program that named itself for the guilty party behind the Armenian Genocide, an event that Cenk denies ever occurred.

Since his program has gone full-on corporate, Cenk himself is pretty much in golden handcuffs, and has since gone increasingly unhinged, snapping at other commentators such as Tim Pool and Alex Jones, who just wanted to talk to him.

Just days ago, MisterM proceeded to milk the drama cow on Twitter, daring Cenk to call Joe Rogan a “loser” to his face, enticing him with a $1000 donation to either his “trash network” or a charity of his choice.

A real grownup would have ignored the dare, but Cenk instead drew the line where he felt more comfortable.

Being the grown-up that he is, Cenk not only took the dare, he also escalated the rhetoric to imply physical violence, then made the claim to be able to “end” the trained fighter, in spite of his own lack of experience (and conditioning).

Natch, Cenk decided to accept the $1000 for himself, rather than to a charity.

While Cenk made the hilarious claim that he’d “end” Rogan in a fight, Cenk’s optimism isn’t backed up much in the realm of reality, putting aside the remote possibility that Cenk could benefit from either a freak accident or copious amounts of interference.

While there is no such thing as an MMA black belt, Joe Rogan does have a black belt in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, and has become a Taekwondo Grand Champion, and apparently has kickboxing experience. He eventually became a UFC commentator.

As for Cenk, he made the claim to have been fighting for his whole life. If this was the case, his fighting experience is not publicly-available information. Cenk’s claim to be “larger”, comes off as an inappropriate boast in his lack of physical conditioning.

I honestly have no idea why fat people have as much confidence as they do in their bulk. They may be big, but they’re also soft, and simply moving about is a chore for them. An overweight person started a fight with me before, and he went to the floor quick.

If Cenk did get in a fight with Rogan, he’d likely just find out how fast-paced and callous that fights really are, and come out the other side of the experience more closely resembling a blueberry muffin. Of course, a professional UFC match is a more strategic affair, but Cenk’s historical inability to retain his cool would ensure that within the structure of an officiated match, Cenk’s likelihood of winning would only further decrease.

I get being macho, but I still think I’m being manly when I point out that if I were to get into a fight with Joe Rogan, I’d likely get my ass beat. There’s a lot that can be said about not letting your arrogance get the better of you.

Cenk has a lot of problems, but because he’s rich and famous (enough so that he should consider it low-brow to take dares for money), many of his problems are of the sort that people would rather have. Yet, he has more problems than he otherwise would if it weren’t for his egotism. Therefore, Cenk is among the many people who can quickly make the world a better place, at least for himself, if he were to take the simple advice: Get over yourself.

Chris Chan Thinks He’s Jesus, Now.

After having been jailed and awaiting trial for allegedly raping his elderly mother, Chris Chan is now comparing himself to Jesus Christ. But more than merely making a comparison, Chris Chan actually made the claim to being Jesus Christ, in a letter that he wanted forwarded to Null of Kiwi Farms, and to his defense attorney.

The letter can be read on Kiwi Farms, where Null has provided a transcript. Just be warned that the letter reads as a window into the mind of a kind of crazy that one might have thought they didn’t make anymore.

(By the way, my use of male pronouns for Chris is not intended to be insensitive. Though Chris Chan identifies as a transgender female, the transgender community is not humoring Chris, recognizing his proclamation as an attempt to appeal to lesbian women.)

Hoo boy, where does one even begin to break this down? How about the fact that Chris wanted this letter sent to his defense attorney, as well as make it public? Can you imagine how his defense attorney must feel, having read a full-on, remorseless confession that was simultaneously broadcast to the general public? How is the poor guy supposed to defend him, now?

As evidence, Chris invites anyone to photoshop certain features onto old photographs of Chris (but only certain ones, not the ones where he’s wearing glasses, and only from the shoulders and chest up, which might make it less apparent that Chris is a big beef cow, and that if you were to place one of those yellow jackets on him, he’d look like a school bus.

Chris then wants his picture placed next to a picture of Jesus Christ for comparison. Chris’ request is impossible, because there are no pictures of Jesus Christ. The most popular idea of what Jesus looked like came from Renaissance art, when artists used their imaginations as to what Jesus looked like, which would explain why they depicted Christ as an Italian man.

But what expectation would there have been that Chris Chan would know this?

Chris also calls himself “Central Camera #000”, which indicates himself as the first of observational existences, having perception that he claims as infinite and includes the first-person perspective of all others. If this is a concept that he learned about from some video game, feel free to take to the comments to clue me in. But it does nothing to explain why Chris has been so gullible all these years.

Chris follows this up with a voluminous mountain of self-indulgent mushugganah, where he invites the reader to engage in some kind of transcendental meditation to arrive at his conclusion, and I’ll hard-pass on that. Right now, I’m trying to wrap my mind around the fact that Chris was able to hammer all this nonsense out in a jail cell, absent the controlled substances that would be available to those of us on the outside.

One thing he points out is that the Dimension Merge is “Completed and Concluding”. The Dimensional Merge is a concept that Chris may have invented with the help of a group of influencers called the “Idea Guys”, where supposedly all the fictional universes are to merge with the one we know. Chris has long stated that the merge was underway, but it seems he now thinks it’s “Completed”. That sucks for him, because he’s stuck in a jail cell, and can’t currently experience it.

Chris goes on to lay out his justification for withdrawing money from Barb’s bank account, in violation of an order against him. This justification on Chris’ part legally holds up as a confession. Chris really needs to get it out of his head that having excuses does not absolve him of guilt before he sets foot in a court of law again. But at this point, he’ll likely have already self-incriminated his way to prison.

Even though Chris currently fancies himself as the savior of mankind, he’s still so vindictive that he informs Null that he failed “HIS DESTINED TEST And Betrayed Me”, implying that he had only one test in his life, and he failed it. If guilt were Marmite, that was like emptying the bottle on a single slice of toast.

Then he went on to justify the act of rape that he was charged with, effectively issuing a confession to the act. And what’s more, he’s so narcissistic that he writes of the act as though it were a favor to his victim. And being an apparent fan of the concept of abrogation, Chris has declared “eased up” the Biblical view of adultery, presumably including the prohibition on having sexual relations with one’s own parent.

Chris is pretty far from the first person to use religion as a justification for his own vices. But claiming to be the Messiah while doing so is something special. What’s more, he points to the popularity of the gay and trans movements as though it meant anything other than people were doing what they wanted to do. Just because Chris thinks that he’s a god, doesn’t mean he comprehends that the truth of a matter is not determined by consensus.

So, Chris pretty much admitted to raping his mother, and claimed that he had healed her of her “past sins and regrets”, and that he improved “her abilities directly and personally”. Is it too late for a vomit advisory?

Reviewing this letter, one theory that’s being passed around is that Chris might just be playing it up in an attempt to make an insanity defense work. I don’t know, because it’s hard to tell just how sincere Chris is. From a jail cell without internet access, Chris no longer has “Idea Guys” to fill his head with plop, so either Chris is spewing from the plop that has already been implanted, or his new delusions were actually self-generated plop. In any case, he has ample plop with which to fire his plop cannon, with pages of cheap prison stationery as his target.

If Chris really is gunning for an insanity defense, it would seem he’s yet another legally-illiterate half-wit who believes that a successful insanity defense means just a few months in a padded room, followed by getting off scot-free. Don’t settle for dinner-table legal advice, people.

One thing that Chris seems to excel at is making matters worse for himself. His history of this is long and well-documented, but it now includes confessing to a crime he was charged with in an attempt at his own defense against the very same charge, while simultaneously committing what is considered a capital offense in any Abrahamic religion.

At this point, how can anyone predict what Chris Chan is going to do next? I don’t know, but I suspect that the Sex Offender Registry is about to become far more insane.

A Neighbor Started Listening to Rap, Loudly. Then, Something Awesome Happened.

If you’ve lived in apartments, you know when your neighbors have turgid taste in music. Because they’ll broadcast it for everyone to hear. Things have been quiet in my new neighborhood for a while, until some new neighbors moved in. And they brought their noisy lifestyle with them.

How noisy? Let’s just say that when the man and his wife got into an argument, you knew about it.

But then, they crossed a line. They started playing playing music in the evening. Not only that, it was the plumber’s butt-crack of all music. That’s right, it was rap.

But then, something awesome happened. The building decided that they weren’t going to just sit back and stifle vomit in the time it takes for either the new neighbors or themselves to move somewhere else. Instead, they did something about it.

They turned on their own music. And they turned it up.

I joined them, as you might imagine. I just loaded up a Touhou playlist on YouTube and enjoyed some music I’d rather listen to. Suddenly, it was like no one was playing rap.

Gone are the days in which a person has to be financially irresponsible to own a decent sound system, or even just a television set with decent speakers.

What Can You Do With $30,000?

What can you do if you had $30,000? Let’s get a list going:

  • Buy a brand new smart TV and still have over $29,000 remaining.
  • Live like I once did in central Pennsylvania for about 2 years.
  • Actually buy a new car. Like, new new. As in, it doesn’t smell like someone’s dog, or like someone cigarettes. The filters are new, the engine is well-oiled, you don’t have to look under the hood for a long time, and no one has driven the car before. That kind of new.
  • Pay off approximately one year of a college education.
  • Actually buy music.
  • Leave the store with 88,235 boxes of store-brand macaroni and cheese from WalMart, without stealing any of it.
  • Or splurge on 30,612 boxes of Kraft macaroni and cheese, the gold bling of macaroni and yellow powder.
  • Go to GameStop and buy something like 471 new games (this list may intermittently consider sales tax), and watch how many opened games are inserted into cases before your eyes.
  • Go to the liquor store and purchase about 1765 bottles of the most important foundational ingredient of a Jager bomb.
  • Buy 1000 of them fancy Yankee Candles. Then tell your mom. She’ll be so proud that she won’t even be able to sleep that night.
  • Assemble about 20 gaming rigs.
  • Illegal stuff.
  • Pay off the rent on a cheap-o one-bedroom apartment for about 3.5 years.
  • About 368 of those blue tablets that are famous for increasing circulation in males.
  • Buy the line of Apple products, five times.
  • You’ll have enough money to drink Kool-Aid ironically.
  • Buy about 2400 MREs, becoming the most disaster-prepared homie on the block.
  • Buy about 7518 packs of Pokémon cards, becoming the coolest 10-year-old on the block.
  • Invest in crypto, then watch the boomers who are dead-set against crypto freak out.
  • You’d have a lot of manga to read. Like, about 3440 chapters on BookWalker. And depending on promotions, you could probably get piles more.
  • Buy a ticket to the event to which AOC wore her now-infamous “Tax the Rich” dress.

Webcomic Review: Robot Hugs

Warning: The reviewed webcomic contains explicit content. Reader discretion is advised.

robot hugs rough

Have you ever hoped that depression had an official webcomic? Me neither. But there is one that stands out as being sadder than the rest. And by “stands out”, I mean “slumps down in quivering half-hearted mediocrity”.

Robot Hugs isn’t so much a random, slice-of-life webcomic with a well-defined premise as it is a webspace where the author can dump his sad doodles, and sometimes make long, rambling illustrated tangents on whatever social justice activism that holds his interest, usually things like transgenderism, which the author identifies as being a part of, and feminism, because the author so desperately wants the female community to accept him as one of their own.

Early entries to Robot Hugs are usually random, inane drawings that really have nothing to them. Take this random example:

2011-08-25-A good way to go

That’s not a random panel from a strip. The previous and following comics have nothing to do with it. This is the build-up, delivery, and punch line. There is only one panel in this entry, and that’s it. No point, no effort, and no worthwhile thought.

Stick figure art is something that can be done well. In fact, some pretty good webcomics have been done with stick figure art, such as Cyanide & Happiness. In the vast majority of cases, however, it’s a cop-out that’s used to produce a sub-par product with a minimum of effort while leaning on the crutch of “style”. In some of those cases, it’s how talentless artists are enabled to coast along with a minimum of effort. In the case of Robot Hugs, there is some small sign of improvement as time went on, but it usually involves the bare minimums of stick figure art, such as good color choices and better-defined lines. Expressive facial features are sparse, but that can be sold as minimalism. At one point, he even takes on shading, but gives it up before long. Robot Hugs takes a style that’s mainly ironically likeable for its minimalism, and takes it even lower.

And then, with no warning, the author backs down from all the progress that he’s made on his style and goes to a hand drawn style that’s even worse:

2017-11-01-analogue

To be fair, he does give a reason for why he does this. However, there’s something more to it, which we can read about on his profile: The author studies in UX/IA, which has to do with website design. So he actually does spend a significant amount of his life staring at display screens. However, when one looks at his own website, how exactly is he putting his knowledge in website design into practice? He’s obviously not new at this, as his archives indicate that he’s been at it since 2009, and he usually updates about a half-dozen times a month with webcomics that are sub-par in quality.

Considering all this, and assuming that the author is trying hard, I suspect that the source of his ongoing sadness is that he’s putting a disproportionate amount of effort into something that he doesn’t really have a talent for. As children, nearly all of us are told that “we could be anything we want to be”. This is a disastrously terrible thing to tell a child, as it sets them up to pursue interests that are outside their own talents, and develop such an emotional attachment to their pursuits that they make them a part of their identity, making it an even stronger hit when they fail to live up to the expectations set for them.

The author of Robot Hugs doesn’t want to stare at display screens for long periods of time, and his webcomic has been insubstantial in quality since its inception over 9 years ago. Perhaps it’s about time for him to admit that it’s not his thing to either design websites or write webcomics. What he does instead, I don’t know; that’s the kind of thing that he can only determine after careful consideration of himself and how he can benefit society. However, it’s clear that making webcomics is not his thing.

Unless you can look at this and think “talent”:

2017-02-17-types of rats

The parts of his comic that are the most well-thought-out would be his SJW ramblings, which is not a compliment. If your only exposure to the SJW ideology would be YouTubers who make fun of them, go ahead and read an opinion piece from a veritable SJW. What you’ll find out is that the aforementioned YouTubers aren’t making up strawman arguments, they are actually taking on the SJW ideology itself, exactly as it’s presented when SJWs speak for themselves.

Here is a link to an example comic. (WORKSAFE WARNING: If you click that link, your employer’s IT department might think you’re an idiot.)

And speaking of worksafe warnings, the following came from the Robot Hugs “About” page:

NSFW comics are generally labelled as such.

Except they’re not, so his archives are a minefield of cartoon penises and vaginas that you might object to if you are somehow upset by naturally occurring features of human anatomy, or if you have a problem with these things being drawn poorly. The main character’s nipples might be considered explicit, considering that he’s a biological male who identifies as a female. Would they be? Have we figured it out yet?

And, as if it weren’t already obvious that this comic stars a self-insert, the author uses the webcomic to give us life updates:

2012-10-19-New Tablet

Whoop-dee-doo. Too bad your new tablet didn’t do anything to make your comics any better. You know what would? Having someone else do your art. And your writing. And your website design, for that matter. In fact, maybe you should pull a George Lucas and sign over creative control of your comic. Too bad that a guy would have to be insane to take this mess on, and once they come to their senses, they’d deep-six the whole thing.

The author of Robot Hugs spends too much time trying to be something he’s not: a webcomic artist, a decent website designer, even a woman. He doesn’t have what it takes to do any of these things; it’s time for him to stop kidding himself.

Robot hugs gets a score of a-sad-excuse-for-a-comic out of ten.

sick score

Which would be a 0.5 out of 10. If you’re thinking of making your own webcomic, you can do a better job than Robot Hugs with just a little something called effort.