The following post on X was brought to my attention by NotTheBee, a humor page which was originally founded to commentate on news stories that sound made up, but were actually true. Today, it’s more of a right-wing social commentary site focusing on current events and random social media posts. Intermittently, it makes boomer posts bemoaning the passing of days gone by, including ignorant Matt Walsh like takes on anime.
One of their recent posts brought up a social media post which included a rant from a high school English teacher, who listed off things her students said about the book adaptation of Shakespeare’s play, Romeo and Juliet.
Which, by the way, is not the masterpiece that it’s been made out to be, and certainly doesn’t deserve to be elevated to the status of sacred cow, as it has been.
But we’ll let the students speak for themselves:
Remember that the boomer generation thought that Bernie Mac was funny, whose entire routine was making fun of the things his kids said and did. Even though they were his own children, thus their knowledge base was his responsibility.
How anyone expects a child to know something they haven’t been taught isn’t something boomers have explained, but that’s an expectation that too many of them seem to have.
Let’s break this down:
‘Was there time back then? Like did it exist when Romeo and Juliet were alive?’
This sounds legitimately stupid, so it’s natural that it would be selected to frame a rant about how stupid students are. If I were to give the benefit of the doubt, I’d guess that when the student said “time”, they meant “clocks”. Which would be a legitimate question to ask, if poorly-worded.
There would also be the assumption that Romeo and Juliet were historical figures, rather than works of fiction. This is also kinda understandable, in a way. Outside of manga, when I read books, it’s usually to be informed, not entertained. Most books, Romeo and Juliet included, are boring.
Though, having worked retail for a decade, I know that stupid people actually exist. If that student were legitimately stupid, they’d be just years away from harassing a poor store employee over something petty, all while their food bill is being paid for by the rest of us.
‘Oh, so you actually hate us.’ (I had asked them to get the books out).
Again, Romeo and Juliet is not a masterpiece. It definitely does not deserve to be placed above criticism. Thus, the student is valid in their feeling that they are being punished by being made to read that book.
Romeo and Juliet was adapted into a novel for the intention of entertainment. This was a self-defeating endeavor. Most novelizations are.
‘Is Shakespeare a real person because I thought he was maybe one of those Greek gods so I’ve been confused.’
A child cannot be expected to know something that they haven’t been told.
‘Bro’s a hella stalker.’
A cheap shot at Romeo. But the implied frustration at having to read his story is understandable.
‘Bro also has bad rizz’
I don’t have a woman’s sensibilities. But if a student believes that he lacks appeal, that’s an opinion that’s valid.
Also, I know that Zoomer slang ignites the disgust of the cheap seats. If this is you, remember that you used to call things “sick”, “tight”, “fly”, “bangin'”, or “dope”. Get over yourself.
‘Oh, he wants that hottie huz, huh?’ (this is about Romeo pursuing Juliet)
Believe it or not, people want to have sex. That’s why they get into the kind of relationship that Romeo pursued. His desire was natural and human, and to point it out is to make a simple observation.
The teacher probably cares about the slang. For the most part, I don’t.
‘Romeo is hella cringe, get him off my screen.’
Agreed.
‘We don’t need subtitles, we’re not old.’
What’s wrong with this statement? We’re talking about high school students. If none of them are hearing impaired, then subtitles for what they are hearing is entirely unnecessary.
Needless subtitles create the habit of a person’s eyes drifting downwards in conversation, which can be awkward. But if someone is caught doing that, then they have high school English to blame.
It seems as though making Romeo and Juliet required reading in school has led to an epidemic of student complaining. The solution to this problem seems obvious. To me, at least.
And that would be to stop making Romeo and Juliet required reading.
Magnetricity 