When a Pokémon Bears a Stronger Resemblance Than Intended

A few years ago, I pointed out that a Pokémon resembling Donald Trump has been added to the Pokémon franchise through the Sun and Moon versions.

According to GameFreak, the makers of the Pokémon games, the Pokémon, named Yungoos, was not intended to bear a resemblance to Donald Trump.

Donald Trump, as you’re likely well aware, was nearly assassinated just days ago, the gunman only having succeeded in removing a chunk of Trump’s right ear.

Yungoos has an evolved form, named Gumshoos, which bears a stronger resemblance to Trump. Notice something about its ear?

Yeah, it’s got a notch in its ear.

To be fair, both its ears are like this, and some small mammals do have bifurcated ears. So, I feel inclined to say that this is just a coincidence. After all, why would GameFreak be able to see the future?

But I expect some people to point to this as evidence of the simulation glitching out.

Trump survived an attempt on his life

That came as a surprise. As you’ve probably already heard, an assassination attempt was made against presumptive Republican nominee and former President Donald Trump as he was speaking at a rally in Butler, Pennsylvania, which is about a dozen miles north of Pittsburgh.

The event was a shock. But when the dust settled, the presidential candidate escaped with an apparent minor injury. At least two people are confirmed dead, one of which was an innocent event attendee, and the other was the presumed gunman.

About Trump, I have never seen one man win so hard in such a short amount of time. It was only last month that Trump defeated current president Joe Biden in a debate so convincingly, that Biden’s own party, and the leftist information media, started expressing a strong desire that Biden withdraw from the race. To put that into perspective, the same establishment forces have conspired for the last three years to try to convince us that everything is fine, even though the buying power of our money has plummeted, and the cost of energy, food and rent have soared.

And, shortly before that, Donald Trump was convicted of 34 felonies in what was obviously a politically-motivated show-trial, and an attempt to deny the American electorate a preferred candidate and a voice.

Just yesterday, seconds after an assassination attempt, Trump saluted with his fist in the air, with a fresh, undressed bullet wound in his ear.

If the election were held tomorrow, Donald Trump would easily win over 500 electoral votes.

As for the attempted assassin, I could imagine what was going on in his mind after firing the first shot, and Trump only looked mildly annoyed, like he was swatting a fly. The gunman had to have realized with horror that his final moments would come with the greatest failure of his life.

The shooter has since been identified. He was the kind of guy you might have imagined: a noodle-armed wussie. The guy had a family and a cause, and his final actions brought shame and disgrace to them all. Not only that, the guy just handed victory to the man he attempted to kill. It’s hard to imagine failing so immensely.

A short while ago, I finally decided to buy a MAGA hat. I viewed it as a piece of political memorabilia. But now, I’m wearing it, even as I’m typing this.

As I see it, the attempt on Trump’s life was yet another in a long line of attempts to deny a return to the presidency for a candidate who deserves to win, and yet another attempt to deny the American people the candidate who we prefer, and yet another attempt, whether by a corrupt establishment or by a fringe actor, to defeat this constitutional republic while pretending to save democracy.

At this point, you’re probably wondering what you can do. For one thing, and this should be obvious: Don’t resort to violence. There’s way too much potential for it to backfire, as we’ve seen just yesterday.

Also, you probably don’t need anyone to tell to you to vote for Trump, because you’re probably already going to do it. As of this writing, Americans would turn up in droves to vote for Trump, and polling places might need extra staff to prepare for the influx of voters. Considering recent events, along with the failures of the current administration, the average American voter would vote for Trump, even at the risk of being fired upon, themselves.

The obvious aside, what I suggest is to pursue virtue. Invest in yourself by trying to be a better person. This can be done by working out and getting into shape, tracking caloric intake (there are apps that can help immensely with this), and studying to become better at your career. Avoid self-destructive behavior of any sort. If you drink alcohol, keep it in moderation. If you smoke, or otherwise abuse drugs or other substances, try to quit. If you build yourself up, the result will be a better you. A sound body and a sound mind contribute to each other, so be virtuous in both respects.

You’d certainly be better able to handle the challenges that are ahead.

I was wrong. Sigewinne is great.

Disclaimer: Primogems are a precious in-game commodity. I advise you to pursue multiple opinions as to which characters to pull for!

It’s been a few days since I wrote up an article claiming that Sigewinne from Genshin Impact was shortchanged. In the time since, I realized that a key aspect of her kit, a healing charge attack that heals the entire party, was just what I wanted for my party.

Before you go and wish on her banner, know that she might not suit your team or your play style. There’s also the fact that I had her signature weapon to give to her, which I obtained while pulling for Furina’s weapon. My experience with Sigewinne may have been influenced by that, which is something to consider if, for some reason, my opinion is what influences you to pull for her.

But hey, I was wrong before, such as when I wrote an article calling Sigewinne shortchanged.

Sigewinne is a bow user. I wouldn’t primarily use her for her bow attack, but it’s something that’s proven useful for my team, which otherwise lacked a bow user. Those are great, because when you happen upon a wild critter, you can get some extra cooking ingredients out of it. I’ve gotten so used to not having a bow user in my party that I’ve easily forgotten that I could do that.

But you wouldn’t find yourself cooking as often, because her charged attack heals your entire party with each “bounce”, (except Sigewinne, who gets a big chunk of healing when the attack duration expires). And using it again only takes waiting out a cooldown.

You don’t even need any targets to use this move, so if there’s any time that your party needs healing, just have Sigewinne blow bubbles. And yes, this does make the game much, much easier. And it’s made bosses that I’ve struggled with nearly trivial. Sigewinne can take an account from getting by to thriving.

Sigewinne’s elemental burst is a bit controversial, as she has to remain on-field for its duration. But that’s acceptable, as it’s comparable to a mini-Neuvilette. The damage output is amazingly high, so as I see it, it’s worth the inconvenience.

Building Sigewinne is simple in theory: if you’re in a hurry, just select artifacts to get her HP as high as you can get it. Whether it’s offense or healing, the major aspects of Sigewinne’s kit scales off her HP. A bow that increases HP (such as her signature) would do great. In fact, her bow was easily tailor-crafted around her elemental charge, which was already her selling-point.

Sigewinne with her signature weapon, Silvershower Heartstrings. Don’t look at me, I didn’t name it.

Sigewinne is a great comfort healer on her own. In fact, she would seem to be the best in the game in that regard. Yes, contrary to what I said before, Sigewinne is better than Barbera as a comfort healer (putting aside Barbera’s auto-revive at C6, which is great). Barbera needs her burst to do full-party healing, which is inconvenient when exploring, and her charge only heals the active character, who might get wet as a result, which could result in unwanted elemental reactions. Like getting frozen.

So, Sigewinne is a great comfort healer. She might even be the best comfort healer in Genshin Impact, so far.

And, before I forget, she can actually automatically heal characters that fall below 50% HP while they are swimming in the depths of Fontaine. She only needs to be in the party to do this, and the only catch is that the ability has a cooldown. So if you were already good at fighting in the depths of Fontaine, you’d become almost unbeatable. This is great if you plan on spending plenty of time in Fontaine’s waters, which is likely if you plan on leveling Sigewinne.

Truth in advertising: Hoyoverse marketing depicts Sigewinne gathering the flower needed to up her level cap.

As far as teammates go, I haven’t attempted using Sigewinne in any post-game content, such as Spiral Abyss, but I think it’s safe to say that she’d be one of the many who would want Furina’s company. And the two go together amazingly well. Furina reduces the party’s HP, while increasing damage input as the party’s HP changes, and Sigewinne adds more damage output with Furina’s ability by also changing the party’s HP, by bringing it back up. After those two, you could pick just about any main DPS and any sub DPS, and have a killer team. Because you’d have hydro application covered by Furina and Sigewinne (mainly Furina), you could pick your other teammates for a desirable elemental reaction that involves hydro.

My current team’s sub DPS is Xiangling, with the main being a C4 Gaming. Triggering vaporize for high damage is simple, and this team is super fun to play! The main flow is to have Furina’s troupe gang up on the baddies, activating her burst, if available. Then, Sigewinne activates her charge, and optionally, you can fire off her burst. Xiangling activates her burst, if available, and you can plop down Gouba, if desired. If all the bad guys weren’t already demolished, then Gaming can come in and clean up. Switch to another character and reactivate their ability, if desired. Just mind your HP, as Furina’s ousia charge can zap your party’s HP. But hey, don’t forget that you have an adorable nudibranch on your side to make the boo-boos all better!

It seems like Sigewinne is getting some undeserved hate from people who aren’t even giving her a chance. While I got swept along with that for a while, my experience with her has been very positive. To not run along with the crowd has its rewards.

But Sigewinne might put a sticker on you while you’re not looking.

Hold on… Do they actually believe this?

I know that we’re well beyond the point of taking old media seriously. But I would have imagined that The New Republic would have been one of the publications that would have preferred that we go back to the good old days. You know, the days in which people were less connected and less informed, and willing to take old media seriously with big stupid grins.

It would seem otherwise, unless they were really sincere with their new cover, which depicts the man you’re voting for this November with a toothbrush mustache:

Wow, depicting Trump as Hitler! What a stunning and brave move, especially in the current political climate!

I would have thought that “American fascism” would have involved propagandizing the American people, but it seems like the American Hitler has a Jewish daughter, three Jewish grandchildren, authored a peace treaty between the Jewish state and a handful of formerly antisemitic states, and was the only president in the last few decades to not start a new war.

Intellectual dead-ends have been accusing their political rivals of being fascists for so long that it’s just become background noise, like the old music you hear at grocery stores. And I have little doubt that they believe it, because I know that stupid people actually exist.

What I’m starting to wonder about is whether their intellectual betters who have been propagandizing them are actually intelligent, as disingenuous as they may be, or whether they actually believe what they are saying.

Communism survivors have relayed that the point of struggle sessions was to get them to declare their loyalty to the state, whether they were sincere or not, because the very act of making such a declaration had a psychological effect on the one making it, where they eventually believed what they were made to say.

In the same sense, did the propagandistic arm of the establishment finally succeed in convincing someone with their pure, untreated verbal sewage? That is, did they finally succeed in convincing themselves?

What’s especially worrying is that if people can be convinced that someone has been doing something grossly immoral, it becomes easier to convince them to commit acts of violence against them. In light of this, such blatant defamation and dehumanization is not a harmless crime. Left-wing violence has long been a problem, but with the propaganda arm of the left egging them on, I fear it’s only going to get worse.

If the U.S. is heading toward a civil war, media pundits will have played their part in bringing it about. But trust me when I say that nobody should want it. Because the cost would be way too high, even for the winner.

Considering this, irresponsible journalism should be subjected to the ridicule that it richly merits. And with its new cover, The New Republic has certainly earned it.

This is the most shortchanged character in mobile gaming history.

I think we know what power creep is. But for the benefit of those who don’t, here’s my attempt to explain it: when a game with the potential for updates is introduced, an economy of power is established, and it’s often expressed to the player how characters compare to one another through attributes such as attack power, techniques with area of effect, efficiency of play with the given resources, and in many other ways. As the game is updated, new characters, equips, techniques, or what-have-you are introduced which tend to be more favorable when compared to what’s established. Thus, players tend more towards the new content, as it tends to be more attractive given the in-game resources available to the player.

Pokémon is one example of a game where power creep has happened. In the base games, the legendary bird Articuno was one of the strongest Pokémon, due to the damage output of its Ice-type moves. But in successive generations, more legendary Pokémon have been introduced with preferable abilities and moves, some of which play directly to the Pokémon’s strengths. The Pokémon Trading Card Game is even worse; players might remember a time when 100 was a lot of damage.

While power creep is often spoken of as though it were a bug in game design, from the viewpoint of the developers of mobile games, it’s a kind of feature. It’s a way that developers can introduce new content into their games that catch the attention of established players who may believe that they already have ideal setups, and give them more content to strive for that might be a more practical choice, compared to what’s previously available.

However, game developers must be cautious with power creep. It’s one thing to introduce a character with attributes that challenge the current meta, but if power creep is accomplished through raw stats, then previous premium content can be left in the dust, and there wouldn’t be much reason for players to concern themselves with it. But if a new premium character doesn’t have an advantage over other established characters, then there wouldn’t be much reason to care for the new character. Its a delicate game.

One mobile game that I can think of that’s been hit with power creep pretty hard is Pokémon Masters EX. My first truly OP premium character in that game was the sync pair of Leon and Charizard. I thought it was pretty cool that he had a really strong attack that can be used for free after using a setup move. That was a few years ago, and since then, we’ve been introduced to characters that pack such an absurd punch that even Leon has been overshadowed, despite him being the greatest trainer in the Pokémon lore!

To move closer to the topic of this article, let’s look at Genshin Impact. While power creep has occurred, it’s handled it relatively well. It’s true that some of the premium characters have been overshadowed, but none of the old ones have become an absolutely bad choice. For example, there are still players who main Klee, and get it to work.

Lately, there has been some impressively powerful characters that are relatively new. One would be Nahida, who combos well with other characters due to her Dendro element. Another would be Furina, which grants huge damage output as she decreases the party’s HP, but pairs well with full-party healers which further boost her damage output. Then there’s Neuvillette, a high-damage-dealing catalyst wielder. Arlecchino does a lot of damage, but with the drawback of not being able to be healed by teammates, but is still exceptional in the hands of skilled players. Clorinde is a fast-paced damage dealer.

These are all relatively new characters. Thus, it would be easy to make the case that Genshin Impact is being hit with power creep, even if in a slow, carefully-controlled way.

However, as it so happens, there is a character that one can point to to make the case that, while power creep may be a trend, it’s not a constant. And that character would be the newest one to hit Genshin Impact, Sigewinne.

It seems the train of thought with her is, “Make her cute, and hopefully, no one will notice that this poor girl is not worth their hard-earned primogems.” She’s a Hydro element full-party healer with some decent damage output, but there’s a problem: other characters can do what she does, but better. Among these is Barbera, whose charge attack steadily heals the active character, and whose burst attack significantly heals the entire party. And better yet, once she reaches C6, she automatically fully revives an active party member who faints, once every 15 minutes.

What’s more, Barbera is available to all players once they hit Adventure Rank 18 and complete a certain quest, something that players can do within a month of starting the game. And because Barbera is a 4 star character, getting her to C6 can be reasonably accomplished, even if it would take a while for most players.

Making things worse for Sigewinne is the fact that her debut banner is running alongside the first rerun for Furina, a character that should be preferred by just about anyone who hasn’t already obtained her from her own debut. Because Furina gains a lot of fanfare stacks from partywide healing, one can make the case that Sigewinne pairs well with Furina. But do you know who else can do that? A bunch of other healers, such as Jean. It says a lot about how Furina has impacted the game that a character that hasn’t stood out in a while is now quite viable.

The train of thought may have been to debut a character alongside another one she would hypothetically pair well with, but what ended up happening instead is that the rerun banner greatly overshadowed the debut! And this was a great disservice to the character of Sigewinne, who was obviously designed to be highly endearing. Sigewinne would have been considerable as a 4 star character, to be randomly pulled while pulling for a 5 star banner character. If that was the case, she could have made her debut within Furina’s rerun banner. But instead, here she is as a 5 star featured on her own banner, with a signature weapon on a different banner that’s competing for pulls with a weapon that players would rather pull.

I do like the character of Sigewinne. She has a beautiful and tragic story. Not as much as Aerith from FF7, but it’s comparable to that of Marona from Phantom Brave. It’s because of this that I would have preferred that she had a better kit, which would be viable in more than just a few hypothetical fringe cases. And even if the character was made to appeal to girls and women who play the game, don’t they deserve better?

But one thing that I can say about Sigewinne’s kit is that it does resist power creep. Well done.

Credit: Sentaun

But the joke’s going to be on us if it turns out that Sigewinne forms a game-breaking combo with a Natlan character.

The Emperor Has No Clothes.

I sometimes find myself thinking that I have to explain old fairy tales, because it’s apparent that most of the people around us are yet to glean the subtle lessons behind them.

Such is the case when it comes to the story of The Emperor’s New Clothes. To sum it up: A conman went to the emperor and sold him a new set of clothes. He was able to convince the emperor that the clothes were something special, when in reality, they were nothing, and when the emperor wore them, he was completely bare.

The emperor was so enamored with his new clothes, that he decided to parade about while wearing them. At no point did any of the emperor’s servants or advisors correct him, and he set out down the streets wearing his new “clothes”. And, for that matter, none of the assembled crowds questioned what they were seeing, either. They agreed with assent that the emperor’s new clothes were magnificent.

But then, one guy spoke up. “Why is the emperor naked?”, he asked. Though one might think it was the most obvious thing in the world, only one guy either noticed or cared to acknowledge what was really going on.

While we might like to imagine that the guy was praised for his insight, the people around him “corrected” him, saying that the emperor wasn’t naked, he was wearing new clothes. They were either saying this because they were just that ignorant, or because they were just that dead-set against gainsaying the emperor.

And when the emperor heard what the man was saying, the emperor was angry, because if he was right, then this meant that the emperor, who was supposed to be the wisest and most insightful man in all the land, was duped by a con artist.

The specifics of the story will vary depending on who is telling it, possibly blunting the intended moral of the story to various degrees, and diminish it’s commentary on society and human psychology. But the main takeaway is usually either that there isn’t much benefit to being the one person who sees what’s wrong, and speaks up about it, or that if no one else in the room is pointing out what’s wrong, that makes it your duty.

If you’re wondering where I’m going with this, I’ll get right to it: The emperor is bare-ass nude. He has been for a long time, and the corporate establishment and much of the body politick refused to acknowledge it. His peepee is showing, and rather than squint to be sure, they instead turned and said, “Nuh-uh! Stupidhead!”

But then last week’s debate between Donald Trump and Joe Biden had taken place. And Biden failed miserably. Not only did people finally start to notice that the emperor was naked, there was his willy, on full display.

Some people coped. There were those who pointed out that Biden had to have had a cold, because his voice was raspy. But I think we’ve all had the cold at some point, and we know that the cold doesn’t cause us to lose our train of thought in mid-sentence, nor does it cause us to ramble incoherently.

We got this routine for years, especially the few of us left who still trust the corporate press to be something besides the propaganda arm of the establishment uniparty, or its controlled opposition. “Biden is actually spry, I’ve seen it behind closed doors!” they’d tell us (and themselves), but it was hard to tell whether it was legitimate ignorance or cope. I know that the political left tends to be more algorithmically segregated, but imagine ignorance to the degree that a person sees someone like Joe Biden, and thinks “lucid”.

Imagine how terrifying and confusing that the world must be to someone who is that isolated from reality. None of us have to labor our minds to imagine a world where the costs of rent, food, and utilities have been skyrocketing, because that’s been our reality for the last few years. But there’s a difference between those who are so ignorant that they’ll circumvent the part of the brain that’s supposed to be inquisitive, and end up attributing price increases to “rich people being greedy”, and those who know that the cost of energy and taxes on property are going up, resulting in higher overhead costs of running businesses, necessitating increases in prices to the end of survival. The difference being, the latter have been actually paying attention.

A basic understanding of economics also helps. And I maintain that that’s the bare minimum to having a political opinion that’s worth anything.

But now, with last week’s debate between the presidential frontrunners, those who have succeeded in isolating themselves from the reality of the matter are now experiencing the kind of dread that’s comparable to the existential horror that comes with the contemplation of souls disappearing when people die. Joe Biden is not all there, and with only about four months until the presidential election, is replacing him as the nominee something that can be realistically accomplished?

Then there’s the way that Trump handled himself. While his typical poise was there, he was able to rein in his usual bombastic tone, and was surprisingly well-behaved. Whether you agree with him or not, he was able to manage a level of decorum while on stage.

Up until that point, Trump was the left’s Hitler, considering him completely incapable of saying anything that could be construed as reasonable, and whatever he might have said that might have been reasonable certainly wouldn’t have passed through the occluded lens of the left’s algorithmic isolation, and into their hermetically-sealed echo chambers.

But, if they tuned into the debate, then they would have actually heard him speak, and even if they weren’t convinced, anyone who was reasonable among them would have had to admit that there were compelling reasons for the convictions of his following. And when you realize the potential for this happening, the left’s insistence on not listening to the other side speak naturally suggests itself.

However, last week’s debate made his insight difficult to avoid. While that may have been revealing depending on who you are, last week’s debate showed us something even more revealing.

The emperor has no clothes.

Made In Abyss Theory: Srajo’s Germ Party

Teamwork makes a dream work.

As a bit of a warning, this article contains spoilers for Made In Abyss, up to chapter 67. This would be especially true if this theory gets it right.

And, to be clear, I really hope it doesn’t. Because if it does, then Srajo is a despicable character, about as much so as Bondrewd the Novel.

To frame this theory, I’d first like to speculate as to the allusions made with the major characters in Made In Abyss. I’ll admit that these allusions may be an assumption on my part, but when held up against what we’ve been seeing out of the major characters, the White Whistles in particular, I think that this assumption holds up.

Personally, I think the major adversarial characters, particularly the White Whistles, are allusions to various types of bad parents. Here’s a few comparisons with adversarial characters that we’ve already seen:

  • Ozen the Immovable is an alcoholic mother who takes things too far. And, worse yet, she makes the boy in her care dress as a girl for her own amusement.
  • Bondrewd the Novel is the father who prioritizes his own career pursuits over his children, and treats them to insincere smiles. While this may sound mundane considering what he’s done, those who have been through it know why that could inspire a villain.
  • Lyza the Annihilator left home and never came back, leaving her own child behind. Nuff said.
  • Wazukyan may not have been a White Whistle, but he easily could have been. His actions may have been an allusion to the cultural practice of “mabiki” in feudal Japan. Consider yourself warned if you look it up, as it might ruin your day.

Okay then, where does Srajo the Obscure fit in all this? To explain that, I’ll first lay out what a “germ party” is. A germ party is the act of deliberately exposing one’s own children to another child who has a highly infectious pathogen, with the plan being that the parents time a vacation for the end of the incubation period, so their children become more manageable as the parents enjoy their vacation.

Having learned of that, you’re probably entertaining the thought of gathering every parent who has ever done this into a huge biomass, to be thrown into an enormous fire. But before you get carried away, you might remember the time that you and your siblings got chicken pox while on vacation. The parents that you may have condemned might have included your own.

As a possible hint, consider the fact that each member of Srajo’s faction, Hail Hex, is kitted with a respirator, except for Frapam, whose physiology is vastly different from the rest of the team.

Neyozel of Hail Hex, wearing his respirator

There’s also Srajo’s signature outfit, which is styled after the traditional European plague doctor outfit, with the conical nose.

Srajo the Obscure

Now, consider what happened when Srajo met Riko’s group: she had Riko’s friends play-fight with Nishagora. She had Riko’s friends bathe together with members of Hail Hex. They then enjoyed a meal together. Afterwards, the groups joined together for a joint expedition, with Srajo stating her intention of having her own group split up at some point.

Ample opportunity to spread a pathogen that Hail Hex had already developed an immunity to.

But with what motive? Quite simply, Srajo doesn’t want Hail Hex to share the glory that would come with a historic expedition into the seventh layer. Whatever prize awaits the cave raiders who make it to the bottom would split better among fewer cave raiders.

And for Riko’s party, it might already be too late.

If you’re wondering what this hypothetical pathogen might do, we may have gotten a glance with the twins, Menae and Sherumi. While Reg was bathing them, they warned him that he and his friends could end up like them! And that’s deeply unsettling, considering that the twins are quadruple amputees, using prosthetics for basic mobility. It might be that an attempt to induce immunity in the twins went wrong, and the result was so traumatic that they don’t even want to recall the experience. Being children, they’re bad at keeping secrets, and could’ve easily blown the lid on Srajo’s plan!

To make matters worse, chapter 67 ends on a cliffhanger, suggesting the possible loss of the physician of Riko’s group, Nanachi. If Nanachi is out of the picture, Nanachi might have been spared the horror of what the rest of the group might endure. But it would also mean that there’d be less potential to treat whatever illness might come upon Riko.

And, without Nanachi, Riko would be the main concern. Faputa is immortal, which might make her immune to any pathogen. And Reg is a living collection of relics, with no biological component that we know of for certain.

Ozen warned Riko to avoid any White Whistle she might come across, and if this theory turns out to be true, then Srajo would definitely have been a White Whistle to avoid!

While most people have a certain attachment to their fan theories, I’d prefer that this one not be true. But even so, I recognize that it does fit in with some of the other themes that author Akihito Tsukushi has already touched upon, and I’d still be excited to see what he does with it in the narrative.

To end this on a bit of a lighter note, let’s consider the fact that Riko is also a White Whistle, which carries the implication that she might not turn out to be a great person, either. Let’s look at some of her less heroic behaviors. She swiped relics that the orphanage sells to pay its bills. Because Reg is a collection of relics, she treated him like property, and ruthlessly violated him while he was unconscious. She filled a notebook up with observations that she made during said violations. She ran away at night, leaving her orphanage to assume that she went on a suicidal journey. She procured amaranthine deceptor larvae in the fourth layer, which she then deployed in a dart against Bondrewd, risking an environmental calamity in the fifth layer, and deploying a bioweapon at the tender age of 12.

I think it’s obvious that we should not be fooled by Riko’s cute appearance, as she could end up becoming a horrible person, a problem that wouldn’t be helped by the influences that she’s been surrounded with.

Hold on, that wasn’t much of a lighter note, at all.

Chuck Schumer’s grill skills

Father’s Day is one of those days where the political elite, including Chuck Schumer, pretend that they can identify with those of us who buy boxes of spaghetti when times are tough.

But things aren’t so tough for his daughter and her wife, because they were somehow able to buy a house in this economy, where property taxes and the cost of energy have pushed the cost of everything else into the stratosphere, and Chuck’s constituents are dutifully blaming the businesses that are struggling to keep up with overhead costs.

Economics, amirite?

So here we are, looking on as Chuck Schumer takes to social media to let us know that he is a normal daddy who is also normal like himself, and he fired up the grill and celebrated something the way Americans know how: by eating stuff. Seeing an undoubtedly completely natural photo op, he posted the picture above.

The first thing that I noticed, before even that the man in the picture is Chuck Schumer, is how he’s cooking his hamburger: with a stack of American cheese sitting directly on a raw beef patty.

LOL wut?

It doesn’t escape my imagination that someone who is as out of touch as Chuck Schumer would pose for a photo op that’s so cheesy that only an AI image generator that’s been outdated for five whole minutes would give it a pass.

But what really requires a suspension of disbelief is that he somehow lived to a ripe old age when his cooking technique with ground beef could land someone in a hospital, especially if he were to try something similar with chicken.

But the cheese resting on raw beef is not the only thing wrong with this picture. Putting aside Chuck Schumer. See it?

Not only was the cutting board taken outside, where it won’t do anything, a pair of glasses were set directly on top of it, presumably before going right back on someone’s face. And worse yet, they were set lenses down, something that a person with glasses should know to not do.

Now, based on what you’re seeing, what is the likelihood that Chuck and his family know anything about guns and gun safety? And with what intellectual capital is he in the position to influence public policy, including gun control?

Whether it’s Chuck Schumer or his social media team, someone was bright enough to figure out that he was being criticized, because his post featuring the picture was removed from X. But perplexingly enough, this was the filter through which his photo was passed to make it onto X.

But as we know, what goes on the internet stays on the internet.

To wrap this up, what follows is a complete list of everything right with the picture above:

Star Wars cannot be salvaged.

Normally, when I want to write a review, I try to avoid other people’s opinions of what’s being reviewed beforehand, because I want my review to be my genuine opinion. For anyone who has set out to write a review of Star Wars’ The Acolyte, this has become just about impossible, because the “creative” decisions made by Disney has proven to be a greater threat to the franchise than any Sith could manage to be, and as a result, social media is dragging it across nails.

Don’t get the wrong idea; I had no intention of reviewing The Acolyte, because I had no intention of watching it. While I was aware of it, it largely escaped my notice as it came around, because I don’t even bother with Star Wars, anymore.

I used to be a fan of Star Wars. I was introduced to it as a kid. At that point, Star Wars was a story that George Lucas wrote with the intention of making religion more interesting for children, which he evidently did with a reimagining of the story of David and Goliath. Except he showed a kid who wanted to be a pilot being radicalized into joining a terrorist organization by a religious zealot, then the kid went on to destroy a military base, killing millions.

But since Disney took over, their creative decisions have proven more disastrous than when George Lucas noticed that people were actually paying attention, and he decided to stop plagiarizing Dune. I gave the franchise a chance to change for the better, but I’ve since decided that I don’t really need it, and I’ve discovered that anime is better at avoiding identity politics and narcissistic power fantasies.

Based on what I’ve been hearing, I thought that the dumbest thing about The Acolyte would be the scene which showed a fire burning in space, without oxygen. Considering that Star Wars was the series that originally gave parsecs as a measure of time, not distance, it would have been a whatever moment.

But then, it turns out that it featured a sect of lesbian space witches who willed themselves pregnant, probably because their fertile years ran out as they furthered their educations and careers. So they became intersectional feminists because it’s easier to blame men than to confront their decisions to run out their biological clocks on pursuits that women don’t ultimately find meaning in, anyway. Then, after having tried everything but dating, they turned to magic. One can also point out that scissoring doesn’t work, there’s that.

Disney has written vomit. Star Wars was once a hero’s journey style of story, which nearly always involves a lesson that there are things outside of your own interests and pursuits. What Disney has written instead is blatant intersectional pandering and wish fulfillment, which actually overwrites some of the most important features of established canon. If the idea of a space witch achieving pregnancy through force of will sounds familiar, it’s because that was supposed to have been an innovation of Darth Plageus, the master of Emperor Palpatine. Did Disney forget about this? Or are they having as difficult a time keeping the source material straight as the average fan?

I’m not of the thinking that entertainment must necessarily teach a lesson. After all, entertainment is largely made-up, and the authors can insert an arbitrary moral in an attempt to justify the existence of the product to a concerned fundamentalist, and can make the moral anything that they want, including stupid nonsense that has no chance of working when put into practice in the real world. As such, I don’t expect Star Wars to contain some deep, existential meaning, especially with Disney writing it. Star Wars is not going to contain the meaning of life, especially with Disney writing up a fantasy about lesbian witches wishing themselves pregnant.

About the meaning of life, I personally think it’s pretty obvious. Life is about increasing the living mass, and increasing consciousness. You see this in nature, when you see a simple protein taking matter and free energy, and using it to create more simple proteins like itself. From a biological point of view, for us to produce progeny is the most important thing that we can do. And we have the means to do so without having to join a cult which attempts to bring it about with magical thinking. And, when it comes down to it, lesbianism is a subversion of the process.

Star Wars is supposed to be entertainment, but it’s failing miserably at that. That’s to be expected, when Disney is looking to score DEI points with intersectional pandering which alienates the vast majority of people. After all, less than 2% of all people are homosexual, and the rest are likely to be alienated by something that they don’t care to be associated with.

In fact, there’s more at stake than it not being interesting. Do you know what women in general think of homosexual men? They don’t respect them. Because women by nature tend to be more agreeable, they aren’t likely to say as much. But most women don’t want to date a man who has engaged in gay sex. This is because women care whether men have put their features in places where they do not belong. Women view gay men as having an ick on them that cannot be washed off. When heterosexual men are aware of this, it’s natural that they’d want to distance themselves from anything homosexual.

When you have the theory of mind that permits an awareness of this, it’s abundantly clear that writing in homosexual wish fulfillment is counterproductive to a brand whose objective is to have as broad an appeal as possible. I don’t wear the Star Wars logo for the same reason I don’t drink Bud Light: the image associated with the brand is something I’d rather avoid.

It’s because of this that I haven’t bothered with Star Wars in a long time. So when I hear that Disney attempted another spin-off that spits right in the faces of those who are still involved, all that really is to me is a spectacle for me to behold, pointing and laughing.

Other than that, Star Wars doesn’t mean anything to me.

I finally tried Genshin Impact.

I know what you’re thinking, seeing the title and thinking, “Raizen! I thought that you were an anime nerd! Why are you only just now getting around to playing Genshin Impact?” I even wrote an article about it back before it was released, so it’s not like it somehow escaped my attention.

But yeah, as of about two weeks ago, I finally got around to installing the game on my phone, and I gave it a go to see what all the fuss was about. And I’ve been digging into the game’s content. Really digging into it. And as of typing this up, I had no choice as to whether I’d take a break from it, because the game is under periodic server maintenance to prepare for a new version.

Wow, does this game have a lot of content. And while comparisons to Breath of the Wild are already obvious, it’s comparable (perhaps even greater) in terms of content. Which is astounding considering that this is a free-to-play mobile game with almost no in-game content locked behind a paywall (as far as I’m currently aware).

So basically, it’s like Breath of the Wild in that there’s a short outset, after which you can just explore the world at your own pace. Alongside the free exploration, Genshin Impact’s story is quest-driven, with much of the more valuable resources being available in the game’s many side quests, including the in-game currency that is used to obtain the premium content.

Where Breath of the Wild has you only play as Link, but with numerous clothing options with associated benefits, in Genshin Impact, you have the freedom to choose your playable character, each with their own kit, among whom you can swap out on the fly. Much of Genshin Impact’s strategy revolves swapping out your characters based on their attributes, though it’s generally preferable to focus down on a character that you choose as your main attacker, with the rest of the party offering support, considering that resources get more scarce as you continue playing.

What the game looks like.

Some of the in-game resources and quests refresh on a real-time day-by-day basis. Otherwise, you can simply buy up massive quantities of cooking ingredients from shops, and cook up enough dishes so that you can heal up continuously as you blow through the game’s content.

But hey, is delayed gratification really that bad?

And speaking of food, your characters each have a fullness meter, which increments when the character is fed, and prevents feeding them when they’re full. However, it decrements with time. This encourages players to battle strategically, rather than cheese battles by healing up from huge quantities of food each time they take significant damage.

Because the game’s battle system is kinda complex, I appreciate that players are introduced to strategic elements incrementally based on their progress, with players becoming acquainted with some of the games more advanced strategies (such as elemental reactions) after days of playing at a reasonable pace.

Which I might have waived, unless it’s reasonable to expect a player to reach Adventure Rank 29 and a character level of about 50 in a couple weeks. It feels like I’ve been going at it hardcore, but at this point, I might continue on at a more steady pace.

So yeah, I like it. And I’m impressed. I remember a time in which the smug “hardcore real gamers” refused to accept mobile games as real games. And now, here we are, with a mobile game that’s about as deep as some of the deeper console games. And more impressive about it is that it’s free-to-play.

If the option is available, which it is for iPhone, PS4, and PC, I suggest playing this game with a controller. The touchscreen controls suck Chicken McNuggets, as you’d probably expect, but you have the option to switch to a connected controller on your iPhone once you reach a point that reasonably takes about 15 minutes of play (a drop in the bucket, considering all the content this game has to offer). From what I hear, the controller option isn’t available when playing on Android, but Android players are free to clue me in if they get one to work.

As an aside, I thought that this game was coming to Switch, as Mihoyo stated at one point. Are they waiting for Nintendo to release a platform with a beefier processor?

If you go to download it, be prepared, because it’s a doozy of a download. The initial app download wasn’t huge, but be ready for a download of about 23 GB of assets on the initial bootup. When I downloaded it to iPhone, the assets downloaded in about 2 minutes, which is pretty impressive considering that I was situated between a couple hills at the time, without a cell tower in sight. When I downloaded it to PC at home, the same 23 GB took about a half-hour to download. And again, the game downloaded to my phone in about 2 minutes. Cellular technology has gotten impressive.

You might be wondering, “Raizen, why did you download it to your phone, and your PC? Did you start multiple accounts?” No, just one account. You actually can access the same account from different devices, with PS4 being an available choice, if you have one. What’s really cool is that, in Genshin Impact, you don’t save the game. The game does it for you, automatically, and in real time. As it does so, your save data is stored on the server, so you can pretty much just close your game while it’s connected to the network, and you can just resume it when you open it again, even if you open it on a different device.

The downside to this is, there’s no save-scumming. So whatever mistake that you make, you’ve gotta cope.

Genshin offers an introductory Gacha, and enough of a currency to guarantee a character, to introduce players to the gacha system.

As you probably guessed, the game makers don’t keep their lights on by offering this game for free without microtransactions. And while it seems like nearly all in-game content is accessible to players, there is a gacha system that offers premium characters and weapons for a premium currency. Like many such games, Genshin Impact creates an economy that establishes the value of its premium currency.

This premium currency is provided to players over the course of normal gameplay, to the point that players can start making pulls after they’ve progressed to the point that the gacha system becomes available (for players considering making multiple accounts for “rerolls” to increase the chance that they can have premium content early on, in Genshin Impact, this is highly impractical to attempt, because the non-permanant gachas aren’t available from the outset).

While this is the case, unless the player is astoundingly lucky, the pull rates for the best premium characters is astoundingly low. Thankfully, the gacha system does have a “pity” system, which guarantees a random premium item after a certain number of pulls, and has a system that guarantees a featured premium item will be pulled. It’s somewhat complex, but players have figured out how it works.

The downside is, it takes a whopping 180 pulls for this guarantee to kick in, though a player would have to be highly unlucky. It can take months for FTP players to save enough Primogems to guarantee a pull of a featured character, even if they are unlikely to spend them all when they finally make the attempt. It would take 28,800 Primogems to attain enough of the currency used to make pulls to guarantee a banner character, and because there’s two of the “wish” currency, you want to be careful to buy the right one for the banner you want to roll on.

It could potentially take a lot of money for a whaling player to straight-up buy a new character from nearly no Primogems. Which is why, for your effort, you might find it easier to justify combining consistent play with a cheap package which rewards players with 90 Primogems each day for 30 days.

No mayhem here, just totally normal gameplay.

It is hypothetically possible to obtain all playable characters (besides one limited character) in the course of a year as a FTP player, as this is the approximate amount of time it takes for the gachas to cycle through all the featured items that have been released. But this would take an amazing amount of luck. Or a person could whale during that time, if they’re an oil baron’s kid. But I don’t want to calculate the amount of money that could potentially take. I suspect that most FTP players would research which player they’d want the most as they save up their gems, and go for it if they’ve saved up enough for a guaranteed pull and the respective gacha cycles back around.

Okay, story. Genshin Impact has a story. So, it’s like this: Rin and Len Kagamine fly through the sky, minding their own business, when they’re suddenly attacked by some woman who seems mean but is probably just totally misunderstood. You choose between Rin and Len, and your choice determines the main character you play at the story’s outset (and probably eventually swap out for some premium waifu character). The two get separated, so the character you choose and name has to embark on a journey to find their twin. At some point, they fish up some space fairy that nearly drowned, even though she can fly. They then go on adventures, visit cities, and take on numerous quests. Where does the story end? I don’t know, because it’s still ongoing, with more content added as the game is being updated. There are many, many characters, with distinct personalities, particularly the ones that get featured on the gachas. In some cases, you get to test out some of these characters in story battles, where they stomp all opposition with ease, to demonstrate that these premium characters are worth having.

Also, Paimon is ten tons of adorable in a five-pound sack. And considering that she’s one character that you’re going to see a lot of, it’s great that they got it right. The main character is mostly a silent protagonist, so Paimon chimes in so that half the game’s dialogue isn’t implied by subtext.

Paimon sometimes talks herself into trouble.

While you can tell just by looking, I’ll point out anyway that the production values in Genshin Impact are surprisingly high. Not that the character models are particularly realistic, but I appreciate that they did an anime-style game right.

By cel-shading character models AND GIVING THEM OUTLINES.

Which is apparently really, really hard, because for some reason, game makers seem to struggle with making anime-style games actually, you know, look like anime. A sincere “thank you” to the Genshin Impact team for getting it right.

Based on my experience with it, I think Genshin Impact is well-made, and I can give it a recommendation to anyone looking for a robust, mobile JRPG experience.

If you try it, please take to the comments, and tell me who your favorite character is, and why your favorite character is Klee.