BuzzFeed Writer Tries Justifying Jeffrey Toobin, Makes Cringe, Instead

You might remember the story from earlier this week about Jeffrey Toobin getting caught on a Zoom call, molesting his own mushroom. A BuzzFeed writer chimed in, intent on justifying Toobin, but instead made people the world over ponder just what is up with Buzzfeed.

Sometimes, a Freudian slip occurs, when a person accidentally reveals something about themselves that they didn’t intend to. Sometimes, it’s deeply personal, like when you accidentally blurted out your affection for a video game character. (What, just me?) Or like when a person says, “Doesn’t everyone change lanes without looking?”, to which you might answer, “Speak for yourself, and don’t drive anywhere near me.”

It’s because of this that when the title of a Buzzfeed article is “Jeffrey Toobin Can’t Be The Only One Masturbating On Work Zoom Calls”, you kind of wonder about the author, and the staff that permitted the article to survive the vetting process.

I don’t blame the author for taking the opportunity to use euphemisms for choking the chicken, including some I’ve never heard before. But she (yes, she) doesn’t seem aware that “tooting your own horn” refers to something different. Perhaps this is sloppy writing, or maybe it gives away some level of unfamiliarity with the craft.

But she brings up a point about the election simulation. That is, that it wasn’t discussed in much detail. Maybe there’s something about plotting out a violent revolt in response to a Trump victory that really makes New Yorker staffers wanna blow their loads.

But to the author’s credit, it seems like she was merely using the article as a backbone to share humor on the incident, what with her sharing a Twitter meme about changing comic captions, and a Twitter post about an Etsy mug.

There’s the BuzzFeed I know, aggregating content for profit. And producing such intellectual content as Take This Personality Quiz And We’ll Guess If You’re Sweet Or Sour.

So, apparently BuzzFeed thinks it’s normal for a person to squeeze the tomato during Zoom calls, and wonders why something like this doesn’t happen more often. Thanks for the insight into BuzzFeed’s corporate culture, I suppose.

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