TWAT News: Hair Dye Banter Keeps Morons Busy While Grown-ups Are Talking

Hair gel, in one of the many forms recognizable by those who maintain their appearance.

It used to be that you’d have to go to the trouble of fishing out the keys, jingle them, then you let the kids play with them. This distraction buys a surprising amount of time to accomplish something that the kids have no idea is significant, like signing a lease or paying for the food that they end up eating.

Today, you don’t have to do anything, because they are easier to amuse than they’ve ever been.

This is the inescapable conclusion that millions of adults have come to after an RNC press conference in which Rudy Giuliani’s “hair dye” came dripping down, at which point their 17-year-old Minecraft savants took to Twitter to shoot inanities into a digital abyss.

For adults, it’s a sobering moment, as they realize that once these Fortnite legends grow up, they’ll be in a position to change society, and evidently, there’s almost every chance they’ll screw it up. For parents, it’s even worse, as it’s becoming increasingly difficult to deny that these half-wits came from their own genetic material.

On the bright side, they got to do something fun with their genitals nearly two decades ago.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s