TWAT News: Ex-Pat Bombs as Chinese Olympic Skater

If you’re among those insistent that fail can’t be epic, there are many examples to challenge your position. Among these being one presented by Chinese figure skater Zhu Yi.

Zhu Yi is a Chinese Olympic figure skater, and as such, she’s under a lot of pressure to perform exceptionally, as the performance of Olympic athletes has long been considered a matter of national pride.

Especially so for Zhu Yi, the daughter of Chinese immigrants, who changed her name from Beverly Zu and renounced her U.S. citizenship to defect to the Chinese Communist Party, turning her back on the abundance that a free market has to offer in favor of the strictures of Communism.

To illustrate the providence of communism, here is a photograph depicting the monthly food ration of a Polish citizen in the mid-80s:

Zhu thought she could bring honor to her communist dystopia by representing them on the global stage. But that didn’t work out, as during her performance, she fell and hit a wall, then later fell over again. She ended up coming in last for the entire competition.

Because Zhu is so fond of changing her name, perhaps it would be fitting for her to change it again to Wah Waaah.

As bad as all that was, the difficulties are only beginning for Zhu. The Olympics are such a matter of national pride for the Chinese that if a Chinese athlete were to win any less than a gold medal, they are made to issue a public apology. After that, they tend to have difficult lives from that point on.

I suppose the nice guy thing to do would be to pity her, if the nice guy were to forget that she turned her back on her country and went commie.

After her failure, the phrase “Zhu Yi has fallen” started trending on Weibo, the Chinese equivalent of Twitter. That is, until the hashtag was censored. Commies gonna commie.

If you don’t want to end up on That Was Actually The News, you’d be safer if you don’t fail hard while representing your new country, especially after turning your back on your old one.

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